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2:48 a.m. - May 15, 2002
Que sera... what?
Writing about a relationship that has exhausted itself appears overly dramatic and not mentioning it at all ignores the emotional unsettling that is hand in hand with change. The Spec And I experience is over, both a relief and upsetting at the same time, kind of like watching your blood fill a vial after the nurse has tried unsuccessfully to find a workable vein.

No regrets and I said something along the lines of You take care and he said Where Are You Going and it was then that he realized the emotional D & C was about to begin. I don't know why I do that at break ups--cut all ties, move on and file under History. That's misleading; I do know why. I don't like being vulnerable, the defenses go up, and that's that.

So I've had a relationship with a guy. Some good things, some bad, but this is another secret nobody needs to know about.

 

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