8:02 p.m. - February 10, 2003
This entry is a bad flossing experience
Barbara-the-Editor caught me unawares tonight and reprimanded me in her pleasant, straight-forward manner and by the end of the conversation I felt like a cowed dog whose tail doesn't wag. I lied to her outright when she asked why - again - I've disregarded deadlines, claiming I've been innundated by school and work. I'd rather create a weak lie than say I've been sleeping a lot lately - lately? More like since oh, New Year's Day - or feeling listless and unmotivated. I don't own up to being brought up short and I tried to rush her off the telephone and she would have none of it. All of a sudden, so close to completion, I'm dragging my heels, wiping the dust off my materials thinking I need to get back to work but not feeling the urge? Aside from not completing the project yet, it's the fear of imperfection and it's taken hold of the reins. I desire rejuvenation.
Particularly desiring company tonight. I want to cuddle and be warm and fall asleep. I'm tired again.
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