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9:43 p.m. - August 13, 2006
Oh happy day?
A good weekend spent with Mr. Haagen-Dazs and a book, marred only by fruitless calls to iPod tech support. I have killed my beloved iPod and resetting, resetting, and resetting to factory originals with the latest software yields nothing more further aggravation. Help?

Iím a fan of campaigns modeled after The Seven Effective Habits of Perfect People, The Surefire Way to A Better Life, and From Housebound to Party Animal. The latest endeavor is an attempt to be more social and is neatly divided into two functions: Interactions with people and Interactions with the community. Goal? To get myself out of the house more often, to talk to people about something other than work more often, to Ė Iím not sure what. But a conscious attempt at something has got to be better than endless ruminations on what is the sorry fact of my third decade on earth: I am even more removed from others than I ever have been before, a reverse trajectory that is headed nowhere good.

So tomorrow Iím doing something new, I think: Iím donating blood. And that, as my one reader may know, presents a problem since guys who sleep with other guys are barred from donating on the grounds that doing so may taint the nationís blood supply. Never mind the fact that there are (surely) more straight nasty people donating and their blood is welcomed Ė even begged for. I was asked to donate by someone I work with who sees me as squeaky clean and I said yes before I thought about it.

But hereís a confession: Iíve never given blood. I donít know my blood type. And Ė Iíve never had an HIV test. I suppose part of my reticence was that Iím-not-like-them attitude and beyond that, a combination of fear and removal from venues where testing is routine. Maybe Iíll make getting an HIV test my next event.

Iím going ahead with the appointment tomorrow with the Red Cross. Do they go into detail when asking about your sexual history? What is my sexual history?

1. Brittany, 15-16
2. Miri, 15-16
3. Charlotte, 16
4. Patricia, 16
5. Tasha, 17-21
6. Dana, 23-26
7. Ken, 26-28
8. Cameron, 28
9. Ryan I, 28
10. Ryan II, 28
11. Alex, 29
Somewhere in there falls Stanley, the sucked-him-off-in-my-Jeep-in-a-parking-lot guy. I think Iím forgetting someone. So thatís my sexual history as an adult. Evenly divided, 50-50 between women and men, but in terms of numbers of encounters the division is still strongly skewed towards women. It is unlikely this will change beyond the rare deviations from my Iím-happy-being-celibate shtick but I donít think getting head should count anyways, and my days as a cocksucker ended around Ryan II when I discovered a) Iím not crazy about doing it and b) other guys like giving me head.

I feel pretty nasty now.

Just remembered Kevin, from the weekend I went to the gay Christian conference. Damn it Ė now itís 60-40, in favor of men.


In two weeks my travels begin again Ė I donít feel ready but hiding out and avoiding things is generally ineffective beyond the first week or two. Some of the places Iím going to this fall:

Washington, DC (twice)
Dallas (twice)
Baltimore (three times)
Kansas City
New York (Long Island)
San Diego
Boca Raton

When oh when will the folks in places like Alaska or Hawaii book me??!!

Have a good day!


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