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10:36 p.m. - February 06, 2003 I'm not afraid of heights generally - ever - but I'm intimidated by this atrium. If there's glass between me and the ground, a bungee cord around my feet, an operating engine humming, I love being high off the ground, derive a thrill and become giddy. No glass is another thing entirely but I feel it's more than that, something involving trust or security or control, the anxieties calling the shots. Such a silly thing really but I figure guerilla combat, these run-do-it-quick encounters, reinforces the nascent suspicion that no, wait, I am in control. And I enjoy this, saying I can do this and then doing so, even if it's silly. Little things like this make me happy. Have the day off tomorrow and I'll finish writing my paper due Monday. Working title is The Phenomenological Demystification of the Beast: A Kantian Reading of The Iliad. I'm loving the epic seminar too much; I'm tempted to change once again but no! It's linguistics and cognitive science until I'm done. Then we'll talk about literature a bit more. Overall, a very good day. I'm glad; there haven't been many of late. Of late? Who talks like that nowadays?
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