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10:10 p.m. - December 07, 2003
Far from multi-tasking, I'm indulging my other personalities so we each get what we like best: Work, a movie, and reflection cum analysis
For a couple hours tonight I've felt productive and the pages are coming along and I'm rushing to dive into the zone but I'm distracted by turning my head to watch bits and pieces of Angels in America and I'm caught between two extremes: A deadline versus a voice in my head saying take the night off and watch the damn movie. Zone throughout the remainder of December, watch the adaptation in January.

No sleep tonight until I hit Print and the Brother whirs and sucks up the pages. Odd: It is 10:14 and I am confident I will finish this portion, will mail it overnight express to Barbara-the-Editor to get her off my back for just a few days before she asks, Where's more? Only a few weeks before January 1, but I have pages and pages to go.

And in another part of my brain I'm rehearsing for the poetry reading, about the selections and omissions I've made. I'm feeling good about Thursday - Thursday! - and will not give the naysayer voice any room to operate.

And in another, more primal part of my brain, I'm yearning for ice cream, a literal rendition of I scream, you scream, we scream for ice cream and I'm wondering what the heck's going on with my mind especially now that Meryl Streep's also in this movie?

Really must get back to work and listening to the movie. It's not that I know Streep's voice and so know she's acting; I had to turn my head. Just so you know. Of course, I was once said to have a phenomenal memory but that was as a child when school considered me a wunderkind so if I did know it was Meryl but said I didn't because that seems too - pathetic - you wouldn't say anything, would you?


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