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1:23 p.m. - January 23, 2004
Begin self-talk now: I can do this, I can do this, I can do this and not feel guilty
Participating in a social event – onward and upward! – and not overly enthusiastic about the event packed with colleagues because work-talk will dominate and gossip will flit. The mentee has asked if it would be improper for him to attend and I wonder if he felt slighted that I neither informed him of the event nor invited him, thereby preventing him from establishing contacts and an entrée into the Interpreting World of Name-Dropping. I was non-committal in my response, not knowing the answer myself: This is not a friends-party but a people-in-the-same-specialized-field-party-cum-agency-love-fest. I remarked that he’s free to do as he pleases.

My assigned duty is to bring salad. I’m bringing two: A regular leafy-green type, and the Chinese chicken from Mal. Cooking and social in the same day? Strides, strides!

I can be social. I can be gracious. I can be chatty and conversational. I can do this.

Ryan II is a little – hurt? Overlooked? Irritated? – and this is a stumbling block when one is out and the other isn’t. Reminded him we aren’t in a relationship, just dating, so what does he expect? A quick rejoinder: What do you expect? and I feel guilty. Guilty!

Separate spheres of influence, that’s all.


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