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3:49 p.m. - October 24, 2004
Bondage, S&M, and more? Sure, you can tie my hands up
Watched The Grudge last night with Jon and afterward made out and talked for a few hours before going home in the early morning. Learned that Jon is into bondage and I let him tie up my wrists - the restraints were ticklish, is that a normal reaction? - and was struck by how open he was regarding the activities (kinks?) he enjoys. He asked why I blushed immediately after kissing and I didn't know what to say, just shrugged my shoulders and felt silly. I've made out with men and women but why do I feel embarrassed afterwards? He is a good kisser and when I pulled away when he put his hands on my body, he moved them an inch or two away until I was comfortable with him touching me, all the while not breaking his kiss. I gave him a handjob and after, we kept talking.

During the movie I sat close to Jon and grabbed onto his thigh each time I reacted to the film. In my mind right now I'm adding the words like a girl but I don't care, it was nice to let myself be scared and have someone to hang onto. At 6'5 he has a lot of arm and leg available and I made use of them. I love his hands - they're huge - and how he'd rub mine during the movie.

Each time he says I'm a stud I'm slower to retort negatively and frankly, I like that.


Did not go to church this morning. Did laundry, cleaned the house, spent much time on my bed watching television.

How I wish I were - too many qualities I could list there.


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